Today I would like to give a warm welcome to Abby Niles, who is joining us with her recent release of EXTREME LOVE!
When I saw this on my list of blogs to write for Extreme Love’s blog tour, my first reaction was to panic. My gaze snapped up to my roommate and BFF, eyes round in horror and said, “You won’t believe what I need to write about.”
“What?” she asked.
“They want me to give a flirting checklist.”
Her face screwed up in an oh-hell-girl expression. “You’re going to have to do some research.”
In which I burst into a fit of laughter. She knows me well. But it calmed me and I saw how I needed to approach this blog…with honesty. You see, I can’t flirt. It’s a running joke with anyone who knows me. Flirting and my personality just don’t mix. I have more of a chance of grabbing a guy’s attention with one of my off-colored remarks than trying to be flirtatious. I just expressed this to my friend, and she started nodding and laughing. I accepted my flirting skills were nil a long time ago. I can’t be seductive either.
Let me give you an example. A couple of years ago, on my birthday, me and a few girlfriends had a few too many to drinks and the camera came out. We were posing “seductively” for the camera. At least, they were. Me? Yeah, the next morning when we came across my picture the house erupted into hilarity. It was that BAD. I swear, if I could find it, I would share it. So I don’t “flirt” in the traditional sense. So I’m going to share Abby Niles’ flirting checklist.
Smartass banter. I seem to have a quip for everything. It something I really can’t help, the smartass just comes out of me. There are two different reactions I get from men with my free mouth. I get a scowl or a half-smile. The half-smile is usually followed with a witty comeback. I appreciate a good smartass. Being able to toss words back and forth with a man is extremely sexy to me and I’m much more liable to give a great wise-crack more attention than I am a cheesy come-on.
Laughter. No, I’m not talking the breathy chuckle thing. I couldn’t do a breathy chuckle to save my life. I mean real laughter, from the gut. When something really amuses me, I have this laugh. It’s loud and full of mirth. I can turn heads with it. But here’s the thing…when a man gets this laugh out of me because of something he said, his reaction is instant. For a split second, he looks stunned but then he grins, a FULL grin, and his shoulders go a little further back as he stands straighter. That’s right, I just let him know I found him hilarious and most men really dig that.
Be yourself. This is really the most important requirement on my checklist. I have a friend who is a pro at flirting, it comes naturally to her. Sensuous comments come out of her mouth as easily as quips come out of mine. If traditional flirting is your thing, then by all means, go with it! It’s who you are. But if you’re like me and flirting just feels forced, don’t feel like it’s something you have to do. It comes across as strained and, as far as I am concerned, that’s not showing the real you. Flirt in the way you are comfortable with. If the guy doesn’t respond, then most likely he’s not the guy for you anyway.
And there you have it. My checklist. There’s not much to it, but it still brings amused half-smile to a man’s lips and an interested gleam to his eyes. Everyone has their way of flirting. I’d like to hear yours.
Crystal, thank you so much for having me today! Been fun!
Abby is giving away one digital copy of EXTREME LOVE to one reader today. To enter, just leave a comment on this post telling us what might be on your own flirting checklist, or your tips to flirting maybe! Then fill out the Rafflecopter below. Good luck!