Please give a warm welcome to Danielle Doolittle, who is joining us with her new release that hits online retailers today, ROYAL PAIN!
As part of my therapy with Dr. Graham at Sweetwater Creek I was asked to compose a list of items I found essential to my existence on the ranch. Things I thought I would need to survive. I took it upon myself to make it as educational as possible for someone who found themselves in my position.
Carleigh found the list and insisted I share it with you. After she finished laughing at my expense. Bloody woman's lucky I don't have it in my to deny her anything.
Prince Henry's Top 10 Necessities Every Delinquent Royal Needs to Survive Forced Country Living.
1. Bug repellent. Chances are you'll encounter insects the size of a small country It's even more likely they'll bite or sting.
2. A strong constitution. Ranch life will expose one to sights, smell and fluids you have never experiences and will spend your nights wishing you never had.
3. Humility. If you've got it, flaunt it. If not you'd better fake it. No one on a working ranch has time to feed your vanity. They're too busy feeding the livestock.
4. Patience. Literally (or so it seems) everyone's main job is to see how far they can push you before you bloody well crack.
5. A decent hat. You will undoubtedly be spending far too much time outdoors in the baking sun so a sturdy hat is a must if you want to prevent your brain from being scrambled in the heat.
6. Childhood trauma. Be sure to have some good stories to share with The Good Doctor because he will make you talk about them. Repeatedly.
7. A good bodyguard. One never knows when or where a threat might pop up. Also useful to evade the unwanted attentions of the female “guests” at the ranch.
8. A piece of home. Be it a crest, jewelry, a 50 year old scotch; you're going to need something to comfort you in the middle of the night as you huddle on your twin size bed wondering how you've fallen so far.
9. A number to a good lawyer. If for some reason you can't get yourself out of winding up at the ranch in the first place. Find someone who can, preferably with an illustrious track record and exuberant fees.
10. If all else fails bring along an escape plan. There'll come a point...probably between the manual labor and sharing your mother issues with Dr. Graham when the urge to get out will overpower all good sense. Take my advice and have a solid plan set in place (preferably with an escape vehicle because you're seriously in the middle of no where) and get out while you can. Once you're in international waters you're home free.
There is a tour wide giveaway for the blog tour of Royal Pain. These are the prizes you can win:
- a grand prize goodie bag including a handmade bookmark, 3 3x4 magnets, a Royal Pain deck of cards and a tote bag.
- 2 e-copies of Royal Pain
a Rafflecopter giveaway